It’s easier for me to be devoted to God in the Spring. I go to work in the daylight and come home at least a couple days a week with the sun still shining. I can choose morning, evening or both times to strap on my sneakers and head out for a brisk walk, taking time to trudge quietly along a local walking trail listening only for God’s Spirit. It’s easier to hear Him when the dogwoods bloom and daffodils provide sunshine for my feet.
In the twelve step tradition, the fourth step says this: We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. April being the fourth month and me liking structure and Spring – I think April is perhaps the only month that I might have the fortitude to get real about me. So this month I am going to focus on what I need to get real about me. Join me? To get us started, consider this:
Generous in love—God, give grace!
Huge in mercy—wipe out my bad record.
Scrub away my guilt,
soak out my sins in your laundry.
I know how bad I’ve been;
my sins are staring me down. Psalm 51:1-3 CEB
Thing one that I needed in order to get real about me: I needed someone to help me understand that an inventory isn’t ONLY about my bad record. It is EASY to take an inventory and notice what I am MISSING. But in reality, most inventories start out by making a count of what you actually HAVE. As a teenager working in retail I loved taking inventory. We’d count the stuff we hadn’t sold. 22 turqoise rings – check. 14 sterling silver chains 14 inches long – check. On and on it went until all pieces of jewelry were logged into a record of what we possessed. It was only after we knew what we had that we could figure out what might be missing.
Suggestion: Lace up your sneakers and go take a stroll. Go slow. Look up. Look down. Look all around. Next, grab a notebook and write down what you possess. Are you stubborn? That sounds kind of negative…but another way to look at that trait is to say you are tenacious! You may find that some of the best things about you also have drawbacks that result in them also ending up in the “negative” inventory column. That’s ok, we can sort that out later. For today, make a list of what is positive about you.