(We know this post went out earlier today but it was mistake ridden. We’re re-sending it now that it’s been properly edited.)
I have this friend who prefers to live in the future and never think about the past. She’s fun to be around and the life of any party. But she doesn’t deal well with problems and she runs from suffering like it’s a contagious disease. She doesn’t stand still long enough for us to have a conversation and has a tendency to anticipate the next fun thing without helping clean up and do the dishes after the last party. I think this way of seeing and experiencing life is having some unintended consequences.
The immature will die because they turn away; smugness will destroy fools.
Proverbs 1:32 CEB
Last week over a delicious lunch in a new trendy downtown restaurant (my friend rarely eats at the same establishment twice…that would be boring), she told me that her husband was moving on. When I expressed sadness, she waved her hand at me as if to shoo away a pesky fly, “Oh just DON’T get all serious about this. It’s for the best! There are always more fish in the sea!”
I took the hint and dropped the unpleasant subject of her soon-to-be fourth divorce. We carried on as if nothing was amiss. But something is wrong. This divorce will be painful; children are involved.
Part of rigorous honesty requires that we practice maturity. A dangerous roadblock to maturity is taking on a complacent attitude about our part in life circumstances. Either my friend is the most unlucky person in marriage I know, or she has some part in this revolving door of men and marriage. Maturity isn’t getting to the point where we never mess up; it is figuring out a lifestyle practice that helps us stay alert to our part in any mess.
Today, inquire of yourself: is there anything I am avoiding being honest about? What could I do differently?