Self-pity is a strong emotion that colors our perspective. Here’s a great question to ask during a self-pity party, “What if I’m wrong?” Pair it with an intentional attentiveness to ways God has shown up for you. Did he woo you with a beautiful sunrise when you woke up early and anxious? Was the night sky littered with a big moon or twinkling stars while you tossed restlessly in your boudoir? My son Scott likes to say that we often find what we go looking for. Think about that!
I’d suggest grabbing your bible and reading Luke 1:46-55. This is the song of praise Mary sang as she considered her unwed teenage mother status. This was preceded by Elizabeth’s reframe of Mary’s condition. Recall with me that Elizabeth had said this to visiting Mary,
“Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb. Why am I so blessed that the mother of my Lord should come to me? Mary, when I heard your voice, the baby in my womb leaped for joy.” (Luke 1:42)
Three things about this story help me reframe my own life experience. Thing one: the encouragement of one person can totally alter the way we experience our life circumstances.
Thing two: If you are freaked out, find a friend who has taught you that they have the capacity to see God reflected in you. They can remind you of things about you that perhaps you have forgotten. They may have a vision for hope that you cannot see with your head bowed low and your shoulders slumped with the weight of the world resting on them.
Thing three: There is a good possibility that you are not only in need of an Elizabeth but are charged with the responsibility of BEING an Elizabeth in the life of someone else. So prepare. Maintain your conscious contact with the God of your understanding. Your facial expression; your words; your small acts of kindness; these things may radically renew the spirit of someone who is worse shape than you. And that in and of itself is a beautiful thing.