Here’s another passage that I believe condemns shame as a decision-maker while leaving room for a healthy dose of it to inspire us to gratitude.
So now there isn’t any condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2 The law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and death. 3 God has done what was impossible for the Law, since it was weak because of selfishness. God condemned sin in the body by sending his own Son to deal with sin in the same body as humans, who are controlled by sin. 4 He did this so that the righteous requirement of the Law might be fulfilled in us. Now the way we live is based on the Spirit, not based on selfishness.5 People whose lives are based on selfishness think about selfish things, but people whose lives are based on the Spirit think about things that are related to the Spirit. 6 The attitude that comes from selfishness leads to death, but the attitude that comes from the Spirit leads to life and peace. 7 So the attitude that comes from selfishness is hostile to God. It doesn’t submit to God’s Law, because it can’t. 8 People who are self-centered aren’t able to please God. 9 But you aren’t self-centered. Instead you are in the Spirit, if in fact God’s Spirit lives in you. If anyone doesn’t have the Spirit of Christ, they don’t belong to him. Romans 8:1-9
Here’s the thing about shame, it tells part of the truth. In one sense, we are all broken. There are things we cannot do without God doing them for us. When we live selfishly, we have stinking thinking. It leads nowhere good. But when we live life based on the Spirit, the Spirit leads to life and peace. We are no longer hostile to God. This means that shame is no longer the lead singer in our band. Yes, every now and again it sings a verse, and that’s ok because it serves as a reminder of how life can get off track if we don’t remember more fully, more completely, not just a part of the truth but the whole truth of what it means to be fully human. Flesh and Spirit. God with us, in us around us and among us.