Shame is one of those classic Golden Rule things. We don’t want anyone to shame us. Ever. We’ll shame shamers left and right, all day long. You shamed me? You deserve shame. But…do we ever stop to think about how our words or actions might cause shame in someone else?
Some people do. Some don’t. Even if we do consider it, this doesn’t necessarily mean we’re good at considering it. We don’t ever want to be shamed…why do we insist on shaming others?
Well, because it works. Shame gets people to do what we want them to do because it’s so stinking uncomfortable to experience. We’d rather just “go along to get along” than experience shame. Entire families are built and raised on this premise. Companies and organizations too. The reality is, we like to be able to control other people’s behavior. Life always seems a little bit better if we get what we want. I dare you to disagree!